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Kylie's 10/22/13 Letter

11/24/2013

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Hey Everybody!!
 
Weird time to be getting an email from me, right? Well, yesterday my email wasn't working so President said we could stop by the library for me to let you know I'm alive and shoot you an email :) We have a lot to do though so I'll be keeping it short! It's just hard because so much happened last week!!
 
1. Esmeralda's baptism!!!! Do you remember her? She's the one that I found and the sisters started teaching her two transfers ago right when I left the all Spanish area. Well, she's awesome!! I've probably not met a better person. I didn't have a part in teaching her, but it doesn't matter. I played my small part and it was so awesome so see her take that step!!!! I wish I could give you more details. Suffice it to say - awesomeness.
 
Side note: Do you remember Tanya from months ago? Like 10 months ago? Shaky investigator who then called Sister Carolan and I one night saying she wanted to baptize and really change. So we went, taught her, set a plan, and then we never heard from her again. Her aunt said she'd moved out of their house, she said she was young and wanted to club and do whatever she wanted. Kinda confusing, a total 180. Some months later I learned she was pregnant. A few months after that I saw her at her aunt’s house (who's a less active member). Well, Tanya showed up at Esmeralda's baptism, now 7 months pregnant, and afterward told me she needed to talk to me. She said she wants to get baptized. Well, I've walked down that road before. Two stories come to mind. Boy who cried wolf, and return of the prodigal son. My nature says be wary, but I'll go ahead and pick the return of the prodigal son. She came to church, and we've now taught her twice. She's motivated by fear because she's having dreams that her son will only be born with one eye because of her sins. But today, when we taught her, she'd kept her commitment, and she told me that she realized this was for her too, not just him. Sometimes its hard for us to believe people can change, but I know through the gospel she can do it!
 
I'm putting this sad one in between the two happies. Judy sent a text to the Hermanas (Sis Burns and Sis Judd) on Friday. She texted them and said she'll be Catholic forever, don't come back. Literally, that's what it said. Most likely because of her husband. You can guess how I felt about that. She's tried to drop us twice before, but this one was for real I think. She's told me in the past that she knows the Book of Mormon is true, but because of a whole lot of reasons, she's decided to give up on doing what she knows she should. Mostly it's her husband that's keeping her from it. Her husband who I actually translated for at one point to help get out of jail. Oh man. I sure just love Judy, though! One day she'll get there, although it may be in the Spirit world, I won't give up hope! One of the biggest miracles of my mission is how we found her, and I know that the last 9 months she's spent with missionaries wasn't for nothing!

Here's the big one. And I am going to take time to tell you this, although words won't suffice at all. It's about Claudia. I was asked to teach Gospel principles in the Spanish branch. Elder O’Donnell asked me a bit late in the week and said to pick my own topic. But then I forgot, so I actually prepped it Saturday night before bed. I picked faith, knowing that Claudia was going to be there. We've been working a lot on faith with her and her commitment right now that she's been working on is reading Alma 32. She told us at soccer earlier on Saturday that she read more of it and was actually understanding a little bit. Anyway, that lesson on faith was probably the easiest I ever prepped. I don't know why, it was like someone told me just what to do. I pieced in a bible video, Preach My Gospel, a scripture, questions. No stress. Then I woke up early Sunday morning with the idea to take a bunch of little pictures of Jesus (the one in the read robe) and give one to each person, along with having them write some feelings about faith in their Savior. 

Anyway, then the class was packed!!!! Holy smokes, but everything went awesome. And then in the middle, even though I hadn't planned to, we turned to Alma 32. I wasn't exactly sure where to start, or what it was leading to. Claudia is usually the instigator in the class; the one with a million questions. But that's how she's always been - I always study a lot when we teach her, :)  After reading a few verses, she raised her hand, and said she wanted to share something. Share... not question? Ok. She started to say that she'd been reading this chapter more the previous night, and suddenly she began to cry. I don't know how to explain the spirit. When she opened herself up right then, this powerful force entered the room. She was speaking through her tears, but I don’t remember really what she said. Something about how she'd once refused to read this book (BoM)... and some other stuff when all of a sudden she just said, "I believe that this church is true." Those are words we hear a lot in America on fast Sunday's. But wow, in that room when she said it - so many suddenly started to cry. It was absolutely one of the happiest moments of my mission. And I've rarely felt a spirit like that in my whole life. I stood at the front just smiling and yeah, crying a bit. Everyone, some knowing what she and I have been through, just kept turning back and forth between the two of us. A missionary asked how she knew that. She said she just felt it and knew it because of what the scripture said about the seed. We have read Galatians 5 with her about three times I think over the last 10 months, in response to how she'll recognize truth, but she hasn't ever been happy with that answer. All of a sudden, she was experiencing it. It was amazing. That morning I'd jokingly told Sis Paulson, "this class is going to be so awesome, I'm just going to commit everyone to baptism by the end!" If we had been in Claudia's house, that's exactly what would've happened. While I wanted to commit her, I didn't because of the pressure of all those people. I instead asked her what she wanted to do with her faith. She responded, "continue to grow it." And that's what we'll do. Wow!! Just such a huge step!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My heart hadn't been filled with that much gratitude and joy for a long time. And every person in that room felt it, it was perfect.
 
Ok, I'm sure some of that didn't make sense, but I'm not really gonna take time to read over it.  My miracle week! (well, the actual week was pretty lame because almost every person blew us off, or lesson’s dropped. Statistically low. My district leader wasn't happy with the numbers... but who cares. None of our miracles came from any lessons we taught, but through just sticking in there!).
 
I love you! Sorry I don’t have time for anything else, but thanks so much for the messages you sent me! Next week is transfer week. My last one!!!!!!!!!!! I'm freaking out!!!!!!!!! But it's the  time I have to deal with waiting for that nerve-wracking call to see if I'm going or staying.... so I guess that's good. Every 6th monday night for me is the worst! And that's one thing I won't miss. President said a little bit ago that he thought I should be taken out of the ward and just be in the branch again. We'll see!!!!
 
LOVE YOU TONS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hermana Marks

p.s. - Also, Erika had her first date!! woo-ee everyone be growin up!! Craziness. I was really bummed to hear that dad couldn't meet rob at the door with a shotgun... :) Haha
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Kylie's 10/14/13 Letter

11/24/2013

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Hello to all!!!!
 
I'm doing great this fine day! I feel like I'm doing pretty good at being the best me :) I went off sugar completely so thats good!
 
It sounds like y'all are doing a lot of work getting ready for the craft show.  That's cool! It was good to see everyone out working in the shop. :) I just wanted to be there! Although... you did look kinda cold... :)  It's good to know some things just don't change. But you all looked so big! Well, mainly just Garrett, haha what the heck G?! Looked like y'all were doing great! ...
 
But speaking of that cold... I knew it was colder there but I think I kinda forgot what that's like until I saw everyone with their hoods on. Y'all need some gloves! We stay in the 80’s here and into the 90s some days and humidity varies so I can't complain! But yeah, make sure to add boots to that list mom! :)
 
... I'm so grateful for how the prophet and apostles can speak out on modern day issues. Over and over in conference this time I felt like they respectfully, kindly, simply, and boldly taught about how God's laws will never change. Ever. No matter what man does down here. They really set an example of how to respond to questions. I've learned that I need not get nervous about how to answer people, which was perfect since Claudia asked us specifically about gays and the church on Wednesday. I gave her my best Elder Oaks answer, and she said, "oh, ok." No problem... None of us will apologize about God's laws.  
 
Thanks for your words of encouragement Mom! I am looking forward to Christmas! I'm not gonna lie, I've totally been trying to think up some gift idea that I can make and that weighs nothing (so it can go in the suit case). So far I have... a piece of paper. haha. No, I have no idea. But I'm not worried, it'll just be awesome to be together! We could probably just look at the Christmas tree lights all Christmas morning and be happy! oh my goodness! I just realized - since I'm getting home a week earlier than I would of, y'all should totally wait for me to go tromping through the woods to get a tree! Can you wait that long? I bet so! :) It'll be like my b-day present :)
 
Claudia and Greysi are doing awesome. Claudia did say she told Carlos "she's starting to believe in this stuff." And stood up for the difference between the Bible and Book of Mormon. I was so proud of her!!! Marquetta and Robert are doing bad. Their lights got turned off, their car broke down, and Marquetta was basically stoned from a drug they put her on for her bi-polar stuff. And she just called me saying they can't make rent and might get kicked out. We got there on Saturday right as Marquetta was losing it. Tim was so stressed he'd literally just lit a cigarette, and started to smoke. The previous Bishop, who's a lawyer, hasn't gotten back to us, and the court process for divorce is already going to take so long. I'm not really sure what to do, but we'll press on.
 
I really really have to go. I love you all tons!!
Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 10/7/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Good Morning everybody!!!!

Today was the first day in I don't know how long where I opened the door and didn't get smacked in the face with humidity and heat. So awesome!!!!!!!!!! Because it's still been so hot!! When you said 86 degrees the other week, I thought, "really? the humidity must keep it feeling like 98 degrees." But today it finally feels a bit better. Perfect to go to the field and play some ultimate Frisbee. :) I'm surprisingly good at that game these days by the way. You better watch out Will, haha.

Well, I'm doing better this morning. Doesn't General Conference just always do that though? Uplift, chasten, give hope and peace - just when you need it? :) What were your favorites? I loved so many!! I loved Elder Soares' about meekness, and President Uchtdorf, and Elder Nube's... ok, ALL of them! Plus, wasn't the music amazing!! Sometime around the beginning of my mission I decided to put playing the conference center organ sometime during my life on my bucket list. I better start practicing! President told me he knows people. Haha yeah... like the prophet!

We watched it at the church, except for one session, President and Sister Wall invited us over to the mission home. It's crazy to think I did the exact same thing for April Conference. Man, I've been in BR a long time. Very sadly, Robert and Marquetta and their family didn't come, and neither did Claudia, again. That's two conferences now!! I was really excited for her for this one because she's been coming to church lately and having such good experiences. We also had a recent good lesson with her where she really explained her fears about baptism. I was really feeling like this conference would be a really wonderful time for her to receive the answers she wants. But I guess not. Maybe next time. As a missionary, Gen conf is like Christmas. All that night before is like Christmas Eve, and then during the morning of studies, you can't focus because you just want to go watch conference!!! It's like that moment on Christmas morning when you're waiting for your parents to get up - haha. And then you're there and listening to the talks, and really enjoying them. And yet each one you hear, you realize it's perfect for someone you know, but they aren't there to hear it!!!! Ah!! So sad and frustrating. You just long for them to be there too!! Goes to show how important it is that we are where we're supposed to be, when we're supposed to be there. That's half the battle. If we do that, then we're where the blessings are going to come .

Let's see.... I again don't know what to write. MLC was amazing, one of the best I've ever been too. Plus it helped that President pulled me in for an interview after. I love the time I get with him, we have a special friendship. So at MLC we have all sorts of instructions, and then it’s our job as Zone Leaders and Sister Training Leaders to take that and present it to the zone at Zone Training Meeting, along with whatever they need. One thing that the mission is going to start focusing on a lot is hope. So president instructed on it in MLC, and then that is what Sis Paulson and I instructed on in ZTM. So many acronyms, I know. It was really wonderful to study. It's actually my Christ-like attribute this month and so I've been studying it a lot anyway and it was fun to study it with the purpose of instructing. Studying hope as far as staying a hopeful individual myself as well as exploring how we give hope to other people, and how that plays in with fulfilling our purpose. It was also awesome to study how the Savior offered people hope, and things surrounding that. It went pretty well, I'd say. Instructing always makes me so nervous, but it's good too. We even made bookmarks for everyone in the zone. That's dedication right there :)

Let's see, I absolutely loved it when Pres Uchtdorf said, "Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith." Yeah! Why do we naturally tend to doubt faith first? That actually doesn't make much sense. Also, I've known that I'll still be a missionary after my full time mission, I've just tended to be sad that it'll be different. But Elder Nube's talk really helped me with that. I believe he was quoting Elder Holland's talk, "Remember Lot's wife" which is also a favorite on this subject of not looking back. I loved how Elder Nube said that in the service of the Lord, it doesn't matter where, but how. When we've learned what we need to, we move on. And usually when we move on, we don't know to where we are going, but we can know that the Lord leads us. Pretty powerful. Also, I loved how Elder Bednar talked about tithing! What neat insights he had. He talked about Law of Chastity in April. I'm kind of hoping he just goes for the main big last commandment next conference - word of wisdom :)

Random side not, have y'all watched the church's bible videos? If not, you should!! They are so powerful! The church has amazing media available. You should go watch the latest one, it's right on lds.org's home page. It's when Christ heals on the Sabbath. I think there's so much to learn in the short interchange between the Savior and the man. We actually used it in our instruction in learning about how the Savior offered the man hope, and then what the man had to do, etc.

Alrightly, I better get going and write my Presidents email. I hope you all really enjoyed conference and enjoyed the great blessing of knowing that God speaks for the issues of today. I love each of you dearly!!!

Lots of Love,

Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 9/30/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Hey Dad,

Thanks so much for your email today! It was awesome to get, I really needed to hear from you. ... I think that the basic crux of my problem is that I'm having a heck of a time being content with where I am called to serve, and with whom. I need to be grateful for whom the Lord has given me to love and serve and teach, with the English work.

And my time is getting short. It's the classic question right? Have I done enough? Was it my best? Is it? It's very real though, and since the beginning of my mission, I knew it would come and so I've tried to avoid it by focusing on making sure I was consecrated a day at a time. But the questions still come. The other thing you know I'm sure, although I haven't told anyone directly because I don't want to hurt any feelings, but I don't want to leave my mission. Not at all. You should probably all start writing me the awesome things about home so I can remember and help me detach from Louisiana! I would be content to come to the airport, see everyone and then come back. After teaching Claudia this week, I just wondered, "how can I leave her?!" I don't really care how hard it is, because yeah, it's been really hard. There are lots of disappointments, and every time I leave an area, it flourishes!! It's partly frustrating. I mean, it's been just me and my comp, with my nose to the grind here in BR Spanish work for nine months, always working with the faith and hope that there are those prepared for us, but I never saw it. And the spanish sisters in my old area and apartment and old district family? With all those people I love, and I'm around nice and close to observe all of it btw, - they are flourishing. The people I taught and barely found, or tried to work with, are either now inviting the sisters to their house (whereas I just spent half my days standing on their doorstep) or they're returning, or getting baptized. Part of me says that it's ok, just be happy. I worked with faith, and the love I showed prepared those people to where they are now, and it's just different missionaries reaping and "harvesting," and I need to be more selfless. The other part of me wonders that if I would have somehow worked harder, or had more faith, worked smarter, taught better, whatever, if those people could have progressed then. But I just cringe when those thoughts creep into my mind because I know they shouldn't. It is just creeping by the way.

But really, despite any of that, I don't care because I feel like this is what I was made to do. I remember that since I was about 12, or really since I can remember, this is what I've wanted to do, be a full time missionary. Do you remember once driving with just you and me, from Moscow to Sandpoint. The topic came up, and I said that I knew I'd serve a mission. You asked why I wanted to. I said that part of it was for a selfless reason: I had to share the peace and joy I had, and part of it was selfish: that I felt like my testimony would need the strengthening that would come from a mission. I don't know if you remember, but it's one early memory I have. And what the heck kind of preteen (or early teen) says that?! I remember that you teasingly asked, "what if you meet your prince charming first?" I think I laughed and said," whatever dad, no I won't." Haha, well I thought it was close there for a bit with David, but it wasn't. I chose a mission. Heavenly Father's answer to my prayer was a mission. Over David, Jerusalem, school, work, etc., it's always been what I'd do. So who am I going to be after this? I mean, I know who I am, but do you know what I mean? I don't really have a desire to get married or have kids, which is contrary to everyone else, although I do trust that it will come. It almost breaks my own heart to write that, because I know that's what I'm supposed to do, but it's just not there right now. I don't know if I really am even up for school, although I know it's what I have to do. I'll just freeze in Rexburg this year! I don't know if I'm smart enough to go back to school and face all those science courses to pursue what it is that I want to do, which is the same by the way. I know I want to go to Jerusalem more than ever, and would love to have that be in Jan 2015, a year from when I get home. But then I really can’t think about any of that, can I? So here I am :) I got up today, was obedient to my schedule, loved my time in the Book of Mormon, and that's what keeps me grounded despite of it all. Is there such a thing as a "quarter life crisis?" :-)

So I look at the bagoblocks page from time to time, and am always kind of wondering how it's going. It's always in my prayers. It's probably been there awhile, but I only just discovered the "Our Location" link. That picture there taken from that side of the lake is awesome!!!

Haha, do I remember about the Jam?! YES! We just barely finished the raspberry y'all sent awhile ago. So Sis Paulson got to try some, and we were both wishing we had more! I told her we could write and ask for some, but then I told her how precious that jam is and that led to me telling her about our joke at home about when someone would ask for us to pass the jam :)

I didn't know about my travel itinerary! Did it tell you if it's a direct flight? Or maybe you just got my arrival time. Well, seeing as how I sent my one jacket home in that package... you're probably going to have to bring me a coat! I'm going to be freezing! If it's at all like last year, it won't really get cold here between now and when I leave. Look for that package by the way. I had some (probably kind of confusing) requests about some memory cards I sent home, so let me know if you have any questions :) Oh, and Mom's email about the camera switch didn't come in till after I'd left the library last week. But I'm going to hold onto this one. I think the problem is maybe that my memory card was too smart for that camera and so the pictures were just blurry on the camera (but will be fine on the computer?) That and the flash wasn't broken, you just have to be smarter than the camera :) haha. So anyway, you should be able to take that money back out of my account, as long as that memory card is fine. Thanks so much for doing that though!!

Mom, your email just came in! Oh, this email is for you too obviously (despite my subject line :). I signed that paper last night and it'll go in the mail today. Thanks for setting up that stuff, that's awesome! I'm so blessed, now I don't have to worry about it. Do you think you could set me up for a chiropractor or massage therapist appointment? I'll find a way to pay for it, I just know it has to be done! My hip/sacrum needs to be straightened back out (literally, haha) - yoga and stretching are only getting me so far these days. Thanks :)

Well, Claudia is doing great, and so is Marquetta's fam. They have kinda become my family!! They call me Sister Sister and say I'm just another one of their sisters haha :) The kids are awesome, the three oldest actually finished the kids Book of Mormon we got them. Robert was smoke free all week except one cigarette Saturday. He told us about it that night (when he picked Marquetta up from the RS broadcast). He was so bummed. But he's picking himself right up again. It was dark so we walked over with them to where they could see the temple all lit up (we're so lucky that it's right by the church!), and they were just so excited that that is their goal one day! Apparently, the previous bishop of this ward is a lawyer and will maybe be able to help with the divorce situation. We just need him to answer his phone! We are working on making a list of everything that needs to be done, including costs so that it's really clear. Then, maybe the ward council will also be able to help. They'll see that Robert and Marquetta are doing everything they can and that this isn't just another family that's going to need help. We're gonna plow through this tumbleweed one way or another! I might miss their baptisms, but do y'all wanna come back in a little over a year with me for their sealing? Sounds like every missionaries dream, right? It'd be pretty cool for you to meet them.

So you took my Book of Mormon challenge huh mom? What date are you going for? I can't remember what I wrote. I'm going for the 20th so I read about 15 pgs a day. It's awesome reading it through fast like this. It's not like it's hard reading, just a matter of doing it. It's cool because you really understand what groups of people went where, and where they were from. Reading it fast, I really get a clear picture. Although it's hard sometimes to not stop and study just one verse of set of verses! But it sure strengthens my testimony to get the big picture again!! No one, farm boy, or scholar, could have written about that many groups of people with all the times and dates and places lining up like that. No siree, that cannot be fiction.

We have a busy week. It's Mission Leader Coucil already again (1st Wed of every month) and then Zone Training Meeting is always that Friday, so lots to learn and plan for. Should be good.

Ok, I better go. Thanks for letting me write my rant. Thanks for waiting till I was ready to talk about it. I look forward to hearing from you next week. I hope it's a good one and that you are happy :)

Lots of Love,

Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 9/23/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Morning Everybody!

It's been a crazy transfer week. My new companion is Sister Paulson. She is from California and hasn't been out too long. I've never seen a person more opposite than I!



The best thing that happened this week is that we taught Robert, Marquetta, Tim and their family a ton! About every other day. One of those big lessons was the Word of Wisdom. We went into it knowing that they each at least smoke. But they also pre-read the pamphlet and were so prepared that the lesson went really well. The best part of my whole week was that at one point Robert said, "I'm not gonna lie, that pamphlet hit me pretty hard. I just want to stop, to change. I just can't let anything keep me from being with my family forever."  You could have cut the silence that brought with a knife! It was so powerful! Woah. They just get it. I don't know how many times I've taught the same principles to people my whole mission, even things like temple marriage when the time has been right. I've taught it as simply as I could, but I felt like people rarely understood. What I held as the greatest truth that gives my life meaning seemed to just fall on deaf ears. But they just get it. It was really neat. They were all at church yesterday and are progressing wonderfully. The only thing is this divorce. Anyway, Robert and Tim were really scared to quit cold turkey so they created a goal and a plan to stop by this week. Marquetta just quit, and she got up and threw her coffee away - haha. Love her. And they each wrote down things to do when they were tempted. It was so awesome. Then last night during our lesson, Robert told us that when he wakes up he doesn't even have the desire or urge to smoke. He always did before. Pretty awesome! I'm getting to witness the Gospel of Jesus Christ change people :)

Well, sorry it's so short, I just can't think of much else to write. I love you all dearly. I hope you are happy and remembering to always do the things that matter most :)

Love,

Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 9/17/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Dear Fam!!!

How is everybody?! Yesterday the high was 101 degrees. Ok, really? It's time to chill out - lol :) But it is gradually getting better. I loved hearing that mom and dad got to go spend some time out at Garfield Bay, that's awesome! And Garrett, you sound like quite the football stud! Keep up the good work, that's awesome. To you and Erika, sorry I've faltered a bit in writing you every other week. I've had a hard time writing anyone lately. But I sure did love that care y'all sent me. That was awesome!

Transfer update: yup, it's transfers week! That's why I'm emailing today. Where the heck did the last 6 weeks go?!! Or the last 15 months for that matter?!?! I just have two transfers left. Yeah, when I did that math, it totally freaked me out. :( Sister Chausow is being transferred. I have absolutely no idea who I'm getting. I was hoping it'd be Sister Ward (we've always felt like we'd serve together again) but she's not getting transferred... so I have absolutely no idea. Although whoever it is probably won't speak Spanish, and.... who knows what'll happen! Our English ward is so big, and I've heard Sis Chausow talk about so many names, people that have either never let us in, or haven't come to church, or whatever. And so I haven't even met a lot of them. It'll get interesting :)

We had such a rough week with our family we're teaching, Marquetta and Robert (along with their children, and Marquetta's brother ,Tim). Marquetta was sick. When we'd go for our appointments during the day to read with her, she'd come to the door very disheveled and say she'd forgotten. She started bringing up random concerns that just didn't seem like her (especially racism stuff. sad.) They're also going through so much financial problems. We knew she had a cold, but it just seemed like something else. And Robert worked so much, we never saw him, so it was a little strange. However, Marquetta did receive a blessing from the elders, and that was a really good experience for her. We (while I was on exchanges with another sister) taught Tim separately at a members house during the week and it went amazing! We were teaching the plan of Salvation lesson, without the plan of trying again to commit him to baptism. Then about half way through the lesson I realized we had to do that. So we did, he brought up his doubts, we discussed them (couldn't have done it without the members there), and he solidly committed to baptism! It took awhile, but he did it! In that moment, when he said "yes" I swear I saw or felt something change in him. I really felt like we should commit him to the 19th of October, but at the last minute knew I shouldn't. We instead invited him to pray about his own date. He thought that was so cool, no one had ever asked him to do that before (he's been baptized a number of times). The Spirit was so strong! When we followed up with him on it Sunday, he said that he didn't like the idea of setting a date. We thought it was a commitment problem, but as we asked questions and listened, we learned that it's just a foreign thing, and he doesn't know how to get an answer specific like that. He says all other churches "just do it on Sunday, and then move on with services". Haha, so we brought up the 19th, and he said he'd pray specifically about that. Then, yesterday, he said that "he and God are now on the same page". He said he prayed and feels that he wants to be baptized the 26th instead. Wow! I told him that's your bday, Dad :)  He is changing slowly, very slowly, but surely. He knows he has to quit smoking, but he has a positive attitude and I know he can do it!

They all showed up at church on Sunday, and Marquetta and Robert are doing so much better! The kids love church, and the two oldest girls are so excited to come to Achievement days tonight (we were actually asked to teach it too!). And I knew something was up! Marquetta is pregnant!! (not on purpose). We had the most amazing lessons with them on Sunday, as well as yesterday. Marquetta was able to get all her concerns out there. It's a lot of big stuff. They are financially suffering so much right now. To the point where she was really low on groceries this whole last week for her kids. She is a stubborn person, who does not take handouts, but they're kinda stuck. Previously a signature on divorce papers was keeping her divorce from going through, but now it's just the money to pay for the process. She almost started crying at saying how bad they feel for "having kids out of wedlock" and they want to get married right now but can't because they can't come up with the money for the fees. So sad! And she just feels judged, because she said people don’t know her story, all they see is her with 5 kids, one on the way, and she and Robert are not married. And then she starts saying, "Family is just so important to us! We know it shouldn't be like this. Isn't there more to it anyway? Shouldn't a marriage and our family last longer than just here?" Well, actually... yes! We were teaching the plan of salvation anyway, and when we told them each about the temple, the most special and happy spirit was in the room. It just makes sense to them I guess. That's never happened to me before. I hope it's not bad to say, but I am positive this is the reason the Lord has left me here in Baton Rouge, but had me do English work too. I need this family. But more, I really feel like they need me. Things that have happened, the way I teach and understand them, I really feel a purpose. They yesterday each said they want to be baptized. They are considering setting a date to show their determination and faith. Robert says Jan 1, after they move. Marquetta says she doesn't want to wait that long. It's hard to see over the obstacle of the divorce. But it's like the tumbleweed parable. I know it can seem big to us, but it's just a tumbleweed to God. I absolutely love this family!! That was a random jumble, but hopefully some of it made sense!

Alright, I really have to go. So much to do! Oh, one little item of business... I've been having problems with my camera so we tried to exchange it (thinking maybe they'd do it since it was an exchange) but they won't without the receipt. You wouldn't happen to have that would you? Hope so! Also, I'm going to try to send a package home (random stuff I don't need until will I get home - sweatshirt, letters, etc and it can just be put wherever).

I hope you each have a great week!!!!

Lots of Love,

Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 9/9/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Good Morning!

How is everybody?! We had a nice a crazy full week here. Between interviews, and being a taxi service, and MLC on Wednesday with prepping and instruction for Zone Training on Friday, it was a full week. A ton of our appointments fell through, but we taught some. We taught Marquetta and family once, but Marquetta was feeling kind of under the weather so it wasn't the best and we cut it kinda short. Even though she was still feeling sick yesterday, Tim and Robert brought all the kids to church and stayed for all three hours so that's a good sign! We found them through a media referral from their sister who is a member in Detroit. William, did you ever contact people (like her sister in this case) who submitted the referral? If I was this sister, who I think is a fairly strong member, I'd want to talk to the missionaries who were teaching my family!! What do you think? I think Marquetta would be fine with it so that's something we might try to do.

Something that was focused on a lot during MLC, and is going to continue to be a focus, is unity and obedience. The ZL's asked us to instruct on the heavy stuff during Zone training :) We picked 2 Nephi 5 to use. No common or obvious scriptures there about unity and obedience, and it made it so much fun to teach out of! I love teaching out of the Book of Mormon like that! Really applying it.  We started with v. 27: "They lived after a manner of happiness," who doesn't want that?! Then we went back to the beginning of the chapter and talked about where Nephi and his people had been and what they were going through. Then we went through the chapter and discussed some of the things they did. The first is leave the bad environment. It's interesting to note that in v. 1 and 2, Nephi actually prayed (I'm sure with much faith) to Heavenly Father for help. But instead, what happened? The persecution of his brothers became even worse! Side note about faith and God's will: I've discovered very strongly that I think the greatest happiness, or at least contentment in life, comes from learning to reconcile faith in Christ with the inevitability of His will. They aren't mutually exclusive, and sometimes the great tests in faith come when we feel we exercised strong faith, but something contrary to our will and prayers of faith occurs. Rather, strong faith I think is better defined as submissively accepting God's will in our lives, even (and maybe especially) when it is opposite to our will. It can sound very contrary, but I believe there can be POWER in submissively accepting. ANYWAY! Back to Nephi. The Lord's will was that they should leave, so they did. They separated themselves far from their brethren. In verse 8 they named the place Nephi (or Baton Rouge) and they gave themselves a name. They chose to unite themselves! They took upon themselves the name of "people of Nephi," (or Baton Rouge Zone). PMG says that, "We are commanded by God to take this gospel to all the world. That is the cause that must unite us today." Unity has to come first.

Then, in v. 10 we learn that they chose to be obedient. And, I would add, they were united in that obedience. To me, obedience is learning, accepting, and doing the Lord's will. I know that faith and diligence are very connected to obedience, but this week I've been learning how much humility and obedience are interconnected. Under "humility" in PMG it says, "humility is willingness to submit to the will of the Lord and to give the Lord the honor for what is accomplished." Willingness to submit to the will of the Lord.... huh. So then I was thinking about how I can increase that willingness. Immediately, prayer in the bible dictionary popped into my head. It says something to the affect that "prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the Child come in accordance with each other." Something like that. Prayer is the answer. I think always in my life, and in the lives of many, "prayer" is an easy answer to give. And I've absolutely always believed that, but if became more real to me this week in terms of humility and obedience. Prayer is power. That's all there is to it!  

There is so much good stuff in this chapter that I could probably go on forever about! In verse 12 we learn that they took the scriptures and the Liahona. In missionary life I'd probably equate the Liahona to Preach My Gospel, although it could be many things. In v. 16, Nephi constructs a temple. He tried to build it after the manner of Soloman's, but he didn't have all the materials he needed. But he didn't let it stop him! He gave his best effort and his whole heart. In v. 17, it says that the people were very industrious and labored, a lot! They worked hard!! I'm a big advocate of hard work! (thanks be to you mom and dad :) There's a lot of awesome quotes in PMG, but my favorite always has been and probably will be by President Ezra Taft Benson:

"I have often said one of the greatest secrets of missionary work is work! If a missionary works, he will get the Spirit; if he gets the spirit, he will teach by the Spirit and if he teaches by the Spirit, he will touch the hearts of the people and he will be happy. (live after a manner of happiness...) There will be no home sickness, no worrying about families, for all time and talents and interests are centered on the work of the ministry. Work, work, work - there is no satisfactory substitute, especially in missionary work."

Nephi taught his people to do their best, to give their whole heart, and he taught them to work hard. And I think he did it simply by doing it with them. Example and love is always more powerful than words in my opinion. Always. And that's what Nephi did.

So there's some of what I learned! I love how the Book of Mormon can teach some of the same things over and over but in a different way that allows the spirit to teach us more. I applied all of it to missionaries, but I know it can be, and maybe should be more importantly applied to families. I'm grateful to have a family who strives for unity, obedience, as well as always giving our best effort and hard work to everything we do.

Other things are going well.  I loved hearing about Garrett's game and cannot believe he's a freshman!! They won, or Spokane won? I love hearing about football so thanks for relaying that! Any pictures of him in his uniform or action shots or anything yet? I'm glad y'all are getting back nicely into a routine. I'm glad William is healing well, but was so sad to hear about his toe!! Uh! Mine's healing slowly but surely. I'm just always watching out to make sure it doesn't grow back, but stays deadened! haha.

And on that note, I love you all and hope you have a great week! :)

Love,

Hermana Marks

P.S. the photo is the one Sister Wall has us take at the end of MLC.

Picture
Kylie at September's Mission Leader Training
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Kylie's 9/3/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Hey Everybody!!!!

I'm just doing great this week! How is everybody there? You sound busy and like you're doing well! I didn't know you had a rooster! That makes sense I suppose. Well, now you have him... in your stomachs I guess. yikes! haha. So, who did the deed? Was it an 'off with his head!' moment? Uh! haha

Ok, so mom, as a Sister Training Leader I just... act like I know what's going on. Haha, just kidding. Really, I just work with the Zone leaders and Assistants a lot on stuff in the zone, but my main responsibility is with all the sisters in the BR area, about 6 companionships these days. We go on exchanges each week with them. I usually leave the area, and go work with one of them for two days. We observe their weekly planning. Our main purpose is really just support and training. Sometimes it's just fresh ideas for the area, companionship troubles, or more serious problems as I saw a few weeks ago. Sometimes the sister is just seeking a different perspective on something, or, in the case of last week, the sister I was working with is new and really afraid to talk to people she sees during the day. So she asked if we could focus on finding and opening our mouths to talk to everyone. Funny, because none of those things are easy for me! So we learn a lot together. I mean really, leadership assignments don't come to people because they're all knowing, or wise and know how to deal perfectly with every situation. So when I go out with sisters, my goal is really to love them. To work with them, not preach to them. Share experiences and ideas. A lot of times as a missionary you just need a fresh look at things, or some hope. Hope is key. I love these sisters, and I'm kind of figuring out things as I go. And then tomorrow we have MLC (Mission Leader Council) at the Mission Home. William's gone to lots of those; they happen at the beginning of every month. I've only been to one, months ago when it with Zone Leader Council. And then we'll have zone training on Friday where I'm sure we'll instruct.

I went on exchanges in my old Spanish area last week. That was good. There was too much confusion going on with the areas because salt and pepper is supposed to work Spanish and English, not just English. But that wasn't happening, mostly because of confusion, and the sisters didn't really want to let go of anyone. It was too easy for toes to get stepped on. So in the end, we split the area. There now isn't any overlap - we work south baton rouge. Any Spanish people that fall in those boundaries (the 2nd ward's boundaries in South) we cover them, Spanish or English. My love is growing for the 2nd ward, and I feel joy in working hard to align my will with Father's. And it's a joy when I get to go to my branch :) We're splitting time with that right now. 2nd ward one Sunday, Spanish branch the next. Some people now are in "our" boundaries. Dunia, David, Claudia, Mari, Myara and Nino. So that's nice! Nothing's going on with any of them, but we'll keep working on it! And there was a girl that Sis Carolan and I found one time. Her name is Esmeralda. Months later I was in a Spanish market when I thought I saw her again. I began talking to her, we invited her to eat with us, so she did, and we talking to her a ton. She is absolutely AMAZING!! Then I got transferred. It's hard to not teach her, but I'm happy to say that the other sisters are. She's doing wonderfully. She's at church every week, and I'll bet will be baptized soon. I don't think I ever mentioned it, but the same thing happened in New Orleans. After I left, people just started popping out of the woodwork and getting baptized! Ok, so that could be difficult, right? Kind of a "why does all the 'success' happen right when I leave areas, but we never saw any of the fruits of our hard labor? I don't want to see much! Just a little bit!" However, I'm content that it all happens in the Lord's time. I don't know why I'm not that missionary that teaches, and baptizes people. That teaches and reactivates people. But I do get to teach and love a lot of people! But I'm ok, knowing that it's not for lack of worthiness, work, or faith. I was actually in my interview with President this morning (those happen every three months). With all of these ideas in mind, he began giving me an analogy. He was talking about the first wagon trains of pioneers that crossed the plains. They were the trailblazers. It was hard and it was long. They had to scout it out, find the water, the best way, etc. But the trail was then "do-able", or easier if you will, for the rest of the companies that followed. President said, "It's simple. You're a trailblazer. And let me tell you, it's trailblazers that are hard to come by." Maybe he was trying to make me feel good, but it makes sense. I don't mean it in a prideful way. But the way my brain works, it sometimes helps if I can articulate my role. And that really helped me. But that doesn't mean I don't work every day to see success! We of course see it in small ways all the time. But I still firmly believe the Lord sends his prepared missionaries to his prepared people (although the opposite may not be true - important distinction). He never sends us to places where there aren't people ready to hear truth - that just doesn't make sense.

One of those people is Marquetta!!! And her family!!!! I hope (fingers crossed). Their lesson during the week fell through because Robert was working late, and then kids were sick so they weren't at church. However, we taught Tim once! And Marquetta came to a baptism on Saturday in the ward to see how it was. Way cool! And then they were so excited to have us over Sunday night since they missed church. We taught them with members and it was so cool!! Like one of the lessons you read about in Preach My Gospel! It does happen! Members come, they're nice, and testify and man! Just bring an extra awesome spirit! (now Robert’s going to play b-ball this week with guys from the ward!). Then they had us come back last night since Robert didn't have to work. We taught the whole family for the first time (not just he adults) and we watched the Restoration DVD. Those kids are some of the best behaved I've ever seen! Everyone down to the 2 and 3 year old sat perfectly attentive the whole time and everyone had awesome comments. Although one of the kids said they didn't know that they sun could transform into God. hahaha she got a little confused with the part that the light was "above the brightness of the noon day sun". :) Either Robert and Marquetta themselves are just so ready that they completely accept the idea, or it hasn't really hit them yet. I think that mentally, they believe it. They're beginning to understand the whole idea of the Restoration very clearly and Robert said he knows God answers prayers. He said that when he feels really down during his work day he prays for help, and his answer comes when he gets home and the kids just brighten him up. He said that Joseph prayed and that for his answer, he saw God, and it makes sense. Interesting. So many new truths - it takes time for them to sink in, but they're definitely getting it. We're teaching the Plan of Salvation this week. My favorite! We get to tell them that they can be together forever and that we know what they need to do to qualify for that :)

Have I told you any of her story? Fast version - grew up in a hard hard home. Married someone when she was 19, that didn't turn out good. He's now in prison (not exactly sure why, although he was abusive to her). They had three children together. I'm fuzzy on the details, just know it was a hard time. That was all in D (where they also attended Aretha Franklin's Dad's church. Didn't know he had one! Oh, they're black by the way). Then at sometime she re-connected with Robert. They'd been good childhood friends. She says they picked up like nothing ever happened, and he took care of her, and eventually they got together. They have 2 kids together. But Robert is amazing, a real solid guy. The way all the kids act, you'd think he was their biological dad. They really really want to be married, but the old husband is refusing to sign the divorce papers. So please pray that that works out. I know at one point after she met Robert that he lost his job, and they lost their home. She said they were basically homeless. They stayed in a motel for quite awhile, and she counts herself blessed that they were at least able to have that. She then came here with a couple of the kids, and the rest and Robert followed later. They have a small and sort of gloomy-ish apartment, but they are just lights themselves! Robert works at AT&T and it isn't really enough, but he's working so hard. As soon as their lease is up in December they're looking to move to a different place. So amazing where they've been. It's only up hill from here!!

So that's my life! I better get going! We're going on splits with people from the ward council. That actually happens?!?! Wow. I'm excited, hopefully it all works out. By the way, the first branch missionaries ever were called in the branch! None live in our area, but so awesome!!!! And the first ever youth YM in the branch is about to turn 12 and receive the priesthood. He's the Haro's son. Kinda historic stuff! I hope you all have a fantabulous week. Don't be afraid to be trailblazers! It's not a bad thing. Be good examples, smile more, and do something each day to show Heavenly Father you love Him.

Love,

Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 8/26/13 Letter

11/17/2013

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Hello Everyone!

This week was one of those weeks where I couldn't possibly explain what happened, and yet I want to! I spent almost the entire week on a big service project, and helping with some situations in the mission with sisters. I was on exchanges Tuesday night through Thursday with some sisters in the zone. They're doing ok, but need some extra support and training. One of them is from temple square and they're awesome. So it was fun to work with them and get their perspective.

Then Thursday at our zone service project president told us he had a sister that he needed to be with us for a couple days. She was arriving from a different place in the mission, and was having some problems. Losing touch with reality, stuff like that. So we didn't really know much until President called us later saying that she was pretty bad and they needed us to come stay at the mission home with her that night. Come to find out, she was severely concerned with being exactly obedient, so she was freaked out to not have a companion at the mission home. She wouldn't get in the shower, get her scriptures, eat anything, leave your side without asking for permission. So we stayed with her that night, and I was her companion the next day, where we were also doing service - painting rails at a park. But that night at the mission home, I was talking to President Wall when a call came in from this sisters' stake president. President took the call and didn't ask me to leave, so I just sat there and heard most of their conversation, which helped me understand more fully what was going on. President told me when he got off the phone, that he always has people leave for calls like that, but that he felt like I should hear what was going on so I could help her the next day. So she spent that whole day glued to my hip. And I'm not going to lie, it was hard. She had OCD compulsions, I picked up on a little paranoia, and she was just generally confused/detached from reality. Mix that in with some serious questions about the atonement, and wanting to know how she could know if she'd been forgiven. She just kept saying, "I just want to do whatever Heavenly Father wants me, I'm trying so hard, I'm sorry." I could go into examples, but I'm too mentally exhausted. And it doesn't matter anyway, so suffice it to say that I'd never known really what a mental breakdown was, until she had a couple on me. But I found a spiritual gift that I didn't know existed. I dealt with it so well. I found out the things she loves. She feels the spirit through nature/music/and dragonfly's. Which was handy because I still wear that butterfly/dragonfly ring on my finger everyday and she loved that. So we took breaks sitting under this huge tree, and while we were there we sung a hymn to help her calm down. There was this moment when she was what I would call "lucid" when she told me that when she starts losing it and she can't make decisions (because she's paranoid and downright scared of being disobedient) to make her look at me, tell her one happy thought, and then tell her what do, and that she would do it.

When we later got back to the mission home, President told me he'd watched us that day, and he wanted me to come in his office with her when he told her that she was going to go home to get help. We went in there later and he actually put her parents on speakerphone. I never dreamed in my life I'd be in President's office, helping with something like that. Well, trying anyway. She was a total mess when she heard her parents. She felt like a sinner for talking to them, and she felt like a burden for being a problem. So he went through the process of explaining to her what was going to happen. Then the real problem - there was this tiny pill they needed her to take to stay kind of stable. One then, one that night, and one the next morning before she flew out with a healthcare psychologist lady from missionary medical. She absolutely refused to take that pill. It didn't matter what her parents said, what President said, what I said. I did what she told me to do, I had her look at me, gave her a happy thought to cling to, and then told her what was best - take the medicine. She just about did it, but then instead completely broke down. So it was quite the ordeal. Eventually everything got worked out when President told us that he felt like she and I were kindred spirits who promised each other in the pre-mortal life that we would help each other while here on this earth. He then just left us there for a while to talk about friendship. It was a neat experience. But she was so sad about everything and eventually (once we'd obediently talked about exactly what president asked us to for the perfect amount of time) asked me to just play the piano for her. Everything we did was the best for her, and obviously necessary, but kind of heartbreaking. And draining. Then that afternoon we found out about an elder in Kenner, someone I do know living in my old Kenner apt, has cancer and had to be rushed to the mission home and put on a plane the next morning to get emergency treatment. Craziness. Since there was going to be an elder in the mission home, she absolutely refused to stay there, even with a companion and on a different floor. So president had her stay with us. Everything, including the medicine ordeal, all worked out. When we took her back to the mission home the next day, I was so sad for some reason. I just felt so close to this unlikely friend that I'd made. Our spirits are just connected somehow. I’m a loyal soul though, always have been. So while I actually dealt really well with everything, emotionally it hit me hard when we left her there. President did tell me that whatever happened mentally to her happened really fast, so it should reverse fine. I look forward to knowing her and having a solid conversation one day!

Also, huge miracle happened Saturday!! We've found and have been trying to teach a lady, Marquetta. Her appointment’s keep falling through and we weren't really sure what was going to happen with her. But she kept our appointment on Saturday and we had an amazing Restoration lesson with her! I think it was maybe the only lesson Sister Chausow and I taught together all week, and we made it a good one! This woman has been through crazy hard things. And without knowing the words to describe it, she basically told us that all the different churches she's attended throughout her life are apostate and can never give her the answers she wants, and also she wants to know, "what's up with the Bible?! Why is it so unclear?" Haha, I'll go out on a limb and say it -she's prepared. I told her she seemed ready, and her response was, "oh, I'm more than ready!". She, her husband, her brother, and her five kids. That's right! A family!!!!! Quite frankly, there has been nothing going on in the 2nd ward, and no real excitement or anything. But all 8 of them came to church yesterday, and took up a whole middle bench! They came! It was the first time Sis Chausow has ever had investigators in church! They were the only black family in the whole congregation, so people noticed, and it seemed to light this fire of excitement in the ward. All of a sudden our WML is more willing to communicate with us, he called us back for the first time ever last night instead of going through the elders to get to us. Which is a really good sign because for some reason it has been painfully apparent how much Bryce doesn't really trust sisters. So relationships with the ward members is on an upward rise, and we are so excited about this family! I believe we're going to see a miracle. It won't be easy. Her brother smokes. And she herself actually isn't married. She was abused by her old husband, who is now in prison and refusing to sign the divorce papers. Stuff like that, but I have faith, lots of it. And so do they. We had a lesson with those three last night to find out how they liked church and establish expectations, and it went amazingly well. They're committed to two lessons a week, each on the husband’s (boyfriends ?) days off. I believe it's their time for good things. And God brought us to her to bring them.

That's my week! Sorry I don't have time to respond to what you wrote me :) Everyone is definitely ready since I had this whole server/email problem or whatever so I better go. I love you all so much!!!

Hermana Marks

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Kylie's 8/19 Letter

10/20/2013

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Dear Mom and Dad,
 
So really I'm just going to tell you about one crazy experience this week...
 
I was on exchanges on LSU campus. We were on bikes and began biking to institute. It looked a little stormy but like it was a little bit away and we would make it. So we started biking. About 7 minutes into that, it started DOWNPOURING!!! There are no words. More like a torrential, windy, mini hurricane style rain. We were instantly drenched and there was really nothing to do but keep going. So bike we did. We felt so epic. Oh, except I'm pretty sure I got water up my nose. What? I don't know how long we biked like that. Felt like forever, but was only about 20 to 25 minutes. Once we were on campus, we were biking through it the shortest way (I think, it's kind of huge). We went to cross a street, I biked down off a curb (it's just about dark now) when all of a sudden I just stopped. And not just stopped... I kind of nose-dived. I didn't know what had happened! I kind of caught myself and didn't completely biff it or anything. I was so confused, and then I realized...my bike chain. Yup, I've gone off a 100 curbs, but on this one my chain just came right off. I flipped that bike over so fast to fix it. I've never had a lot of luck with fixing those, but my motivation to fix it was big, that plus some inspiration, and that was the fastest fixed bike chain ever! We should’ve won some medal or something! haha So I ripped up my left shoe pretty good from my foot slamming into the ground, and some sweet bruises I discovered later, but we made it totally fine. So there's my epic story for the week.

Most of my stuff got ruined in my "water proof" bag. There should be a disclaimer on those water "proof" tags that says something to the effect of, "anywhere BUT in Louisiana”. Is anything water proof in Louisiana!?! That unfortunately includes my camera... so (side note: William, how much do you love me? I forgot to put it in my note to you, but are you using your camera much these days? I just need one to last me a little longer! You know how I love pictures. However, if you are using it, don’t be afraid to say no. Seriously. I'll figure out plan B. And yes, it was in rice for quite awhile.)

Anyway!! Also, I carry scriptures in each language, even though I'd prefer to just carry my mission Spanish set. I tell you that because all my scriptures are side by side in my bag. I have a mini English Book of Mormon and a Spanish mini Bible that are even in the same pouch inside my bag. And guess what?! All my English scriptures were water logged like crazy!!!! But my Spanish ones, including that little Bible? Not a wrinkle. Ok, now that is a sign! Haha, so I was grateful those are intact. I don't teach much with them these days but they're important to me, and I figure I'll just get some other new sticks when I get home. :)

So that's my epic story. It's always an adventure with me! :)
 
Sorry I'm so short today. Know that I love you all.

Hermana Marks

P.S - Also, Claudia started to read the Book of Mormon right after I left! So exciting!! And I got to see her, and she came to church. I thought it would be forever before she picked up the scriptures but she's reading both and texting us questions!!! Figured you'd want to know. Other that that... on transfer day the hermanas found out that Rob got into anti and now doesn't want to be baptized, read the Book of Mormon, etc. And on it goes with people. But Claudia is that silver lining this week!!!!! Especially since anti has been one of her big problems. Hope!
 
k love you bye

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