Morning All!!
 
I'm doing pretty great today! The sun is shining, and it's about 80 degrees, and it's beautiful! Pretty much my only complaint about life is that I misplaced my sunglasses I love somewhere between the car and walking into Wal-Greens. They were these black ones that looked like ray-bans kinda (like fake ones). They were great! But I found them during hurricane cleanup for free so I guess I can't complain much, it's just so bright! That's ok, I'm sure another hurricane will come soon and maybe I'll find some like it :)
 
I am doing better this week. And you know, it's not because I've really found a solution or answer to any of my concerns or doubts, but just because I decided. It's been building in me the last two days, and I'm really doing well today. I'm pumped about this week. We have some amazing plans with some awesome people. We're gonna have another Book of Mormon class. We're gonna keep working a ton with members, and we have some plans to help each of our investigators. So much happened with each this week! Let's see...our main investigators are...
 
Claudia - came to a member baptism (an 8yr old) about a week ago. I talked to her ten minutes before it started and she was really close. Then she never showed until the very end. It was so sad to watch all the kids go up and watch, and Greysi not be there! Claudia, like all of us is learning to use her agency wisely in the little things. I found they didn't show because they stopped to eat right after I talked to her on the phone. We were pretty disappointed. She didn't want to look at the font after, but Greysi did. I think that if we weren't such good friends, Claudia would have dropped us by now. But I have no doubt we'll be good friends after my mission, and one day she'll get it. We do have a lesson planned with her tomorrow! We've been meeting people in the English ward who speak Spanish (or at least a little). There's one we work with in young woman's who we think will hit it off with Claudia. We're keeping our fingers crossed! Also, we've had a fellowshipper for her in Patricia Hernandez (from Peru - it was her 8 yr old who was baptized. Patty herself was only baptized two years ago, so we helped her plan the entire baptism). I'll tell you more about Patty later.
 
Judy - Oh Judy. She tried to drop us. Try again! She's gotta be in her late 60's or so and is from Mexico. She was the one that we found by a miracle. She told us various things that have gone on lately - stuff her husband has said about her learning new things since she's "so" old, she went to a wedding where she told a catholic priest about us, and he said some things. And all in all she just figured she's been catholic forever, why try to change now. And yet she loves the Book of Mormon, and she has this AMAZING feeling of an open spirit with real intent. So we sat there, listened, asked occasional questions, and listened some more, all the while praying hard! At first I couldn't believe what she was saying, all her reasons for wanting to drop, and things she knows aren't true about the Book of Mormon, etc. In the end, my last question was: everything aside, what did she want? She sat there and thought and then said, "I just want to learn more." She explained how serious baptism is to her, and when she feels it, she'll do it. I actually thought she was really wise in everything she was saying. She asked us to imagine if she came in and explained a bunch of stuff about a rosary, and expected us to understand it, it'd be hard. I mean, because of her family and her history, it's like Catholic is just in her blood. She truly is someone who doesn't know she's looking for something, but when she recognizes that she's finding it, oh she'll act! Might take a while, but she will. And I think every time I listen to her pray, I learn something. She's great.
 
Nancy and Irenio - Nancy's still ready, Irenio's not. But we got them both in a lesson right after Zone conference on Wednesday and it went amazing!! Irenio finally understands for real where the Book of Mormon came from. We've been using the pictures in the pamphlets a lot more, and it's amazing the difference it brings, the things people will think of to say. We have a picture of a person praying that we use. We talk about it, and then help them put themselves in that room as if they're the one praying, and really set the scene, and then ask them what their one question would be to Heavenly Father, if He was right there to answer. (We didn't think this up, President used it and asked me that during Zone Conference this week). Well, what did Irenio say?! He knew the answer right away: I just want to know where the truth is. Where is it? We know he has this Jehovah's Witness he works with, and I don't think Irenio likes the things they say, but it's right there all the time. Because of that, he asks us lots of questions. That day it was, do you think there's a prophet today?" Well, President had also just instructed on ways we can help people with that! It was great! I asked him that series of questions: do you believe God loves us today? and do you believe He is all-powerful? And do we need that help today because of issues the world has today? Obviously the answer is yes! And then we were able to happily and boldly testify that there are absolutely prophets today. I think it sat really well with him. He doesn't show a ton of emotion, he kind of just takes everything and works on internalizing it, but I saw a little smile!
 
Vanessa - going through a very hard time still, but LOVES when we come over! and Isaac and Cesia do too. They are precious! They were the ones we were teaching English. We just found out they are each going to pass the grade they are in; Vanessa is so relieved! But Isaac is kind of refusing to speak English still. He knows he's smart, and he's so frustrated because he says English is the one thing holding him back in everything. Well, Saturday night Vanessa committed really strongly to be at church, for the first time. Then she wasn't there. So we drove way out there to see them afterwards. I think they didn't come because she was reliant on her husband driving them (she can't with her meds), and he got stressed because they don't have much gasolina. He cannot find jobs and it's getting pretty bad, money for food for the kids bad, so it makes sense. But Vanessa was sure happy to see us. She was cooking so we just started to help her. I think my homemade tortilla skills are getting pretty good!

We were talking and I asked Vanessa what she's loved the most about everything we've been talking about. She had a scripture in Alma we used a long time ago she loved! I didn't even remember. So we were able to have a good little lesson. That's the great things about lessons. No one is cookie cutter, so guess what? Neither are lessons! It all started while we were making tortillas and then eventually moved to the table because she wanted to go get the scripture in Alma to show us. I've learned it's all about coming to people's level (in every circumstance) and working up with them from there. And Isaac! When he saw the scriptures, he opted to stay instead of going to play outside. He's 9. He wanted to read every verse, and he had comentarios too! He wanted to read the whole chapter! We couldn't do that, but we did get him his own Book of Mormon, and a picture of Christ for a book mark. He just knows truth! Kids always do! It never ceases to amaze me. I'm sure that for the rest of my life Mosiah 3:19 will have a different meaning because I will always think of certain kids I've worked with here.
 
Let's see...my toe is doing great! I can walk fine. I don't think it's gonna grow back for a long time, but it doesn't hurt. I'm just nursing along my other one because it's starting to do the same thing. I bought this solution that I'm supposed to soak it in and put cotton under my nail and stuff. Easier said than done! I figured I'd try to be smarter with this one so I can keep it on my toe!
 
We got to go serve at the Bishop's Storehouse on Saturday. I loved it. I don't know how, but that service project helped me out some way. Helped me to turn a new leaf. Or maybe an old leaf... before my mini mid-mission crisis. Doing projects like assembling hygiene kits is great, we know it helps out people in dire circumstances who really need it, but to help out the people all around me - the average everyday person who's just trying to do their best with what they have - that was awesome. And I didn't even give anything but some time! It's always awesome to watch service projects like that, how everyone helps everyone. You don't just pick up your order and leave! You help unload the truck, organize it on the tables, fill everyone's orders, cleanup, and we're done. A lot of food and household products were given, a lot. I hope we get to go back next time!
 
I really loved your emails. Thank you so much for taking the time. I've never met another missionary, besides Will, who gets faithful emails like that from their parents. It means the world! Thanks for your unconditional love, thanks for your wisdom, your faith, your prayers, and just being rockstar parents! I tried to write a good update today since I haven't lately. It's not the most spiritual, and it's all over the place, but only 6 more days and we'll be talkin! We will check back today for stuff like phone numbers, and any other stuff about calling Sunday, so if you can, let me know about that.
 
Love,
Hermana Marks

Dear Family, 

I find I don't have much to write today. I think we pretty much talked about everything! I really enjoyed my time talking, it was great to hear each of your voices, and catch up a little!  

So instead, I'll just share a little something I learned from the Book of Mormon the other day. I was reading it in Spanish, like usual, but I found that things were still jumping off the page to me! I'm reading in the war chapters right now, and I find that I love them! Living in this world every day is a battle, so I think these chapters are just so applicable! I've enjoyed reading about the fortifications before, and pondered how to fortify my own weaknesses. ... chapter 49 verse 3 talks about how the Lamanites (after preparing for years) return to attack the Nephites. But where should they start?! Well, naturally they go to Ammoniah, because they had taken that city before. To their utter dismay and deep disappointment, the Nephites had completely fortified the city! While reading this time, in my mind, I connected the word "city" with "sins." We each have sins or weaknesses that we may feel can't become fortified because we've been defeated there before. This may be because of continued weakness, which causes discouragement. We might mess up in something again, pledge to never do it again, but then we do. Then with renewed prayer and conviction, we say "never again!" But then, we mess up again, and some may eventually think "well, that's it! I'm done." I likened the Lamanites to the adversary. When he's got us once (like the Lamanites had destroyed Ammoniah before) he'll come again and again. But we can be strong and fortified in that thing and Satan with be dismayed and surprised just like the Lamanites!

Well, what did the Lamanites do next? Yup, went to the next weakest spot (just as I believe Satan does-he is bent on our destruction). They went to the city of Noah (verse 12), because they figured that was the next best place. What they didn't know is that Moroni had fortified and strengthened every city (verse 13). So much that they couldn't even enter to fight with the Nephites. We must not give the tempter a place to even enter! Well, it was the same with the city of Noah. The adversary does the same thing. He goes from spot to spot trying to tempt us. Personally, he can't usually ever get me in the really big things, I notice it too much, I'm too obedient there. So what does he do? Tries to get me with doubt, usually self doubt. But that is a sin and weakness that can be strengthened! I know we must continually work to strengthen ourselves in every aspect so that when those Lamanites (or Satan) march from city to city (sin to sin or weakness to weakness) that "behold, great will be his disappointment." 

Something else I just thought of while writing this is that I wonder how the Nephites felt after Ammoniah had been defeated the first time? Did they beat themselves up? Maybe. "We're so dumb! What were we thinking?!" Then they recognized their mistake, repented, and listened to and followed Moroni (latter day prophet), I'm sure he was inspired in teaching them how to strengthen the city. My thought is here at this point. With each sandbag they threw down, or each shovel-full of dirt they moved while digging trenches, were they still beating themselves up? Constantly reflecting on how dumb (or prideful or lazy or whatever) they were when the city had been defeated the first time? Reflecting on the pain, grief, and remorse they must have felt? Or were they excitedly doing it, urgently? In other words, even if we're following the prophet and trying our best to strengthen our weaknesses so we don't sin in that thing again, are we urgent, excited, and grateful that we have the tools and truth to repent and become stronger? Or do we beat ourselves up the whole time thinking, "is this going to work? Is it possible that I can overcome this? Is Christ's grace sufficient for me? Not just everyone else, but me?"

The whole thing is making me think of that landmark talk given my Brad Wilcox at BYU- "His Grace is Sufficient" that I've been studying recently. I have so many favorite quotes that I'd like to reference that I think are applicable. Bascially the whole talk! But here's a couple specifically:   "Elder Bruce C. Hafen has written, “The Savior’s gift of grace to us is not necessarily limited in time to ‘after’ all we can do. We may receive his grace before, during and after the time when we expend our own efforts” (The Broken Heart [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1989], 155). So grace is not a booster engine that kicks in once our fuel supply is exhausted. Rather, it is our constant energy source. It is not the light at the end of the tunnel but the light that moves us through the tunnel. Grace is not achieved somewhere down the road. It is received right here and right now. It is not a finishing touch; it is the Finisher’s touch (see Hebrews 12:2)."            -I know grace is there to help us with each effort to strengthen our weaknesses. Just like it was with the Nephites and each trench of defense they dug.  

And another...   "Come, come, ye Saints, no toil nor labor fear; But with joy wend your way.
Though hard to you this journey may appear,
Grace shall be as your day.
[“Come, Come, Ye Saints,” Hymns, 2002, no. 30]

“Grace shall be as your day”—what an interesting phrase. We have all sung it hundreds of times, but have we stopped to consider what it means? “Grace shall be as your day”: grace shall be like a day. As dark as night may become, we can always count on the sun coming up. As dark as our trials, sins, and mistakes may appear, we can always have confidence in the grace of Jesus Christ. Do we earn a sunrise? No. Do we have to be worthy of a chance to begin again? No. We just have to accept these blessings and take advantage of them. As sure as each brand-new day, grace—the enabling power of Jesus Christ—is constant. Faithful pioneers knew they were not alone. The task ahead of them was never as great as the power behind them."

One of the greatest overall things I took from that devotional is that many people might be pulling for us. Parents, bishops, mission presidents, siblings, mission districts, friends, etc. And in that effort to pull for us, they truly do help us. But there is one who truly pulls with us, and that is our Savior Jesus Christ. He's not just there, waiting at judgement day, hoping we'll use his atonement correctly. I believe He is doing that. But it's more. He's truly there every step of the way, pulling with us. That's what I'm learning much deeper right now than in the past. It's wonderful that I can testify strongly and boldly to the people we teach that the Savior is there, with His hand outstretched to them, His grace sufficient for them. I must accept it deeper for myself. I must fight my self doubt or discouragment by allowing my Savior to be there every step of the way, no matter how many steps, and how long it takes to become what my Heavenly Father sees in me. My Redeemer is infinitely more patient that I am, so he doesn't get exausted with my weaknesses (like I do). He is there. I know it to be true.  

Thanks for letting me share! I'm open to thoughts... :)   Oh! I guess I should tell you neither of us is being transferred! I almost forgot! Rather, we are getting and training 2 visa waiter sisters. I don't really have any idea how it's going to work (or where they'll sleep) but we'll double work our area. So we're kinding of being split because each day Sis Carolan and I will work with one sister (and switch back and forth different days) but at the end of the day we'll plan together and study together and everything. Interesting. Just when I thought I was getting decent at planning- a new challenge! I'm sure it'll bring good things! We're trying to look at it as the opportunity it is, instead of wondering how we're going to fill two companionship's time! :) And there will be lessons taught to Claudia, or Vanessa or Judy or Patty or whoever that I'm not there for (it'll be Sis C and one of the other sisters), so it's a little distance from some people which is a little difficult, but it'll all work out.  

Love y'all! Hope you have a great week!
Hermana Marks